Although we are as diverse as snowflakes, can there be some universal telltale signs that one is about to betray the relationship they are in?
Ideally, you should be comfortable being open and making yourself vulnerable towards your partner. Also, you should appreciate them both physically, as well as personality wise. In the end, what holds two people together is their commitment to each other.
Therefore, finding yourself in one of the following situations should be a warning signal:
1. You don’t talk about being in a relationship. More so, when you think about or do talk about you and your partner, you don’t picture the two of you as a couple.
2. You detachedly “estimate” your partner’s attractiveness. Being attracted to one another is what brings people together, and searching for beauty in others is a natural instinct. Nevertheless, in time, physical traits change or fade and other connections strengthen. If months or years into the relationship, you still “evaluate” the person you are with, you either are not that into them, or you have your own insecurities to deal with.
3. You think your partner is fine, but you believe that out there a perfect person might be awaiting you. You are still on the search for others that share your tastes and that are closer to your ways of thinking and of being.
4. You share intimate details from your life with others, yet find it difficult to communicate with your partner.
“Most couples will lie to each other […] because they can’t take the reprisal”, states marriage counselor Joe Beam. However, if your goal is to have intimacy and a supportive relationship, his advice is to exercise giving each other “permission to tell the truth, no matter what.”
5. When trouble is brewing, you would rather seek emotional comfort or counsel from others. You might even discuss your relationship problems with others, but you dread debating these insights with your partner.
6. You operate on a “meant to be” mindset. You believe things should develop naturally in your relationship, and you shouldn’t have to work in order to make them better.
7. You don’t shy away from touching others and you don’t envision it as a problem.
8. You don’t think keeping secrets from your partner is a problem.
9. You feel the need to make some radical changes in your life. Everyone is in pursuit of happiness and enjoys mixing things up. Yet, sudden changes might show that you have not been living consciously and have not paid enough attention to your own inner needs. Your own transformations should not come at the expense of your partner’s feelings and well being.
10. You start spending more time watching porn videos on porn sites then you really should. Moreover, you keep your needs secret from your partner. Also, it might make you indifferent to their needs. This doesn’t actually mean that if you watch porn, you are a cheater, we all love a good bit of porn!